October 1, 2009

Just for me!

PS:Not edited!

A true victim of recession.Sigh!I hate to admit that.But I still wonder why ME?I am sick of all the motivating and optimistic and spiritual lectures I get to hear everyday.But I frankly regret to have done so well in my studies since school.Inspite of reading biographies of people who did a lot of hardwork to make it big,I really dont know why I still have a lot of expectations about my career.I find it hard to compromise.I know this is a bad time to be choosy,But today I feel even if I give away my dreams and ambitions,its hard for me to find a job.
I had a terrible experience when I decided to try my hand in teaching.I thought it would be a good idea to go teach in an Engineering college rather than sitting at home and wait for the 'VISA' which seems to be a illusion! On my first day to college,I was shocked to see the number of private engineering college buses in the stand.Students dressed in uniforms,It was hard for me to comprehend the fact that they were engineering students.Engineering has just become an extension of 12 std.The college was no different from a school.I felt bad about myself coming back to such an environment.But I used to love teaching and I felt it was a good service.But unfortunately the class turned out to be another shock.It was hard to believe they cleared the entrance examination because most of them didnt know even the basic geometry.But the worst part was the attitude of the students.Students behaved to me as if I am some random girl they met in some park .Forget about showing a little respect,they were throwing offensive words on me.My pride just couldn't let me continue there.I found it funny when they asked me'Teacher,Why did you come to teach in a college like this even after doing your MS from US,Didnt you get any other job'.I was heartbroken.I realized how much ever we try for certain things,most of the things are out of our control.
I wish I had lesser pride,lesser expectations out of life.But sometime I think ;Have I not sacrificed enough to have to have little happiness or rather not to be in an 'unhappy' state?

6 comments:

venu said...

I feel the same Bhadra !
I am unemployed for 2 years now.
Worked in telecom. industry and electronic manufacturing but got layed off in 2007. Worked very hard,also tried very hard to do other jobs too but peoples attitude is just terrible. I gave up and want to go my home in india

Maya said...

hmm...I understand your feeling.. you're not alone...is all that I can say...
Good luck dear!

Rakesh said...

dunno what to say yaar..
Good Luck!!

(just out of curiosity, which college is it?? KMCT by any chance)

Dreamer said...

Some of my friends too have fallen victim to recession. I applaud you for having the courage to take up teaching instead of sitting around waiting for better times. It is a fact though, that these mushrooming private Engineering colleges have totally fouled up the education scenario.

Flyaway Mind said...

been there n gone thru it.. thankfully have come out of it now.. so i know exactly how you are feeling.. hang on there ..this phase may lift off anytime quite unexpectedly!!! so just hang on..

Paro said...

I am thoroughly disappointed the way the students perceive teaching profession these days... Somehow this notion that people go for teaching, when they don't get hold of better jobs still remain rooted in the society :( Wonder when perceptions will change.